New Year’s Day Quotes
New Year’s Day: Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.
Mark Twain
One resolution I have made, and try always to keep, is this: To rise above the little things.
John Burroughs
Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account.
Oscar Wilde

New Year Jokes – One Liners

The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass.

When I thought about the evils of drinking in the New Year.
I gave up thinking.

Definition of a hangover:
Wrath of Grapes.(an allusion to Steinbeck’s The Grapes of Wrath)

To kick start my New Year, I took an IQ test and the results were negative.

Have fun!

Happy New Year!